"The true religion of America has always been America."

Norman Mailer, quoted in The Times

"My definition of man is, 'A cooking animal'."

Samuel Johnson, quoted in The Independent

Life is one long process of getting tired."

Samuel Butler, ibid

"A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation."

quoted in Forbes magazine

"A well-written life is almost as rare as a well-spent one."

Thomas Carlyle, quoted in The United Press International

"Even when all questions posed by science have been answered, the problems of human life will remain untouched."

Wittgenstein, quoted in The Sunday Times

"A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject."

Winston Churchill, quoted in The Times

"The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you'll grow out of it."

Doris Day, quoted in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution

"Of all the things that wisdom provides to help one live one's entire life in happiness, the greatest by far is friendship."

Epicurus, quoted in The Times

"Sit as little as possible, and give no credence to any thought that was not born outdoors."

Nietzsche, quoted in The Guardian

"To my daughter, Leonora, without whose never-failing sympathy and encouragement this book would have been written in half the time."

P.G. Woodhouse dedication, quoted in The Guardian

"Only in America can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman."

US comedian Red Buttons on Michael Jackson, quoted in Salon.com

"Twice in your life you are approved of by everyone: when you learn to walk and when you learn to read."

Penelope Fitzgerald, quoted in the Boston Globe

"My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met."

Rodney Dangerfield, quoted in the Edmonton Journal

"I want to die like my father, peacefully in his sleep, not screaming in terror like his passengers."

Bob Monkhouse, ibid

"Good resolutions are a useless attempt to interfere with scientific laws."

Oscar Wilde, quoted in The Times

"Dear God, I pray for patience and I want it now."

Short prayer quoted in the Evening Standard

"Always allow your opponents the opportunity to walk away from the table with dignity because tomorrow they might be your friends."

Willie Brown, former mayor of San Francisco, quoted in The Times

"If you really want something in this life, you have to work hard for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers."

Homer Simpson, quoted in The Daily Telegraph

"Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember."

Oscar Levant, quoted in the Associated Press

"Kill a man and you are a murderer. Kill millions and you are a conqueror. Kill everyone and you are a god."

Jean Rostand, quoted in The Times